Open to a New Day

Finally I’ve finished the drawing from cycle 4.  I feel open.

Since we moved to our home 12 years ago, we’ve been saying good bye to the old year and welcoming the coming year with friends in a way that has become so dear to me.  We hike up a mountain near our home together, send wishes for the coming year out to the fresh air and beautiful vista, eat clementines and ultimately end at our home for a feast.  This week there have been warnings of a storm of the century which had some of the usual attendees hunkering down in their homes.  It was beautiful to wake to a light snow, branches shadowed in white, and the knowledge that it’s only Friday!

The festivities actually start out on New Year’s Eve when we make the capaleti that my paternal grandmother served on January 1st.  We have been blessed over the past several years to have some friends come to help.  As with most old Italian fare, making capaleti is a labor of love.  It has become a ‘don’t blink or you might miss it’ experience for me since my kids and friends have joined in.  We talk, we laugh, we get flour everywhere.  I consult with my favorite picture of Pop and I on the texture and thinness of the pasta.  In years past, Mom and Pop would be making their capaleti around the same time we were, and getting the dough as thin as possible was somewhat of a competition.  There are other experimental dishes that B and I each make along with cheesebread, sausage bread, antipasto and delectible contributions from those who join us.

Today we joined our friends and the walk up the trail was spectacular.  The white blanket on our trail took my breath away today.  I was with some of the people I love most and out in the beautiful woods.  My energy was good, I only halted when I got a hot blast and had to pull over to shed my hats.  At the top we ate clementines, took pictures, spoke about letting go and opening to the new.  Kids climbed trees and others tried to catch some zzzz’s on the snowy rocks.  I quietly scattered the hair that was shaved off in September where I hope birds might find it for their wintry nests.  I took my hats off and let the snow melt on my head.

At home the fire was just enough and the company more intimate than many years.  The capaleti got the best ever vote, finally we used the right size cutter, got the combination of ingredients right and the simple broth was delicious.  B’s Jalapeno Pork Stew with pickled onions and our vegetarian options of Curried Peanut Soup with fried bananas and an Indian curried black eyed peas were scrumptious!  But the most delicious part of the day for me was my feeling of being cradled by love.  Don’t blink or you’ll miss that one.   I think I can speak for those who attend this each year.  It’s a great way to start anew.

Today I don’t feel like I had breast cancer.  I was not reminded much that I am in the middle of round 2 chemotherapy.  I awoke in the quiet early of a snowy January 1st morning.  I hiked with friends.  I hugged my friends.  I laughed and heard the laughter of children.  I made angels in the snow.  I had no trouble letting go of 2009.